Weekend Recap

• Today is a rare day, so you better remember it well. Today I swallow my pride. The same Eagles who I just told you would win the division, are the laughing stock of the NFL. They overpaid Brian Westbrook by giving him a $3 million dollar roster bonus - twice. Now we could be taking a cap hit for it. Not that this will affect our forthcoming world championship season, but it could put us in somewhat of a bind when it comes time to sign draft picks.

• Kevin Durant became the first college player ever featured on a DIME cover.

• Another Sunday, another fucking awesome race. Not for my boy Clint though. The 07 car was just terrible today. They never could get it just right. He fell from 8th to 28th in a matter of less than 50 laps. They fixed it enough towards the end of the race to get him up to finish 16th though. His first win is coming soon, mark my words.
  

• What a race folks. It had everything you could want in a race. There were multiple lead changes, a couple of cautions that created some intense restarts, and even a crazy wreck on the very first lap:

• I really thought Jeff Gordon couldn't be beaten today, his car was fantastic - it was the only one that looked great the entire race. Junior finally took him for a substantial chunk of time on lap 102, and they traded again after that, but he couldn't hold on as he wrecked out for his third DNF out of seven races this year. Gordon finished fourth, for his fourth top five of the season. It again came down to a white flag battle, as Jeff Burton pulled off an inside pass on Matt Kenseth on Turn 2 of the final lap, to take his only lead of the race and become the first ever repeat winner at Texas Motor Speedway. He won the inaugural race there 10 years ago. So congrats to a Richard Childress Racing Chevrolet teammate. At least one of them had something to show for the day - Bowyer and Kevin Harvick finished 16th and 29th, respectively.

• The Mavs - Spurs game was fucking awesome as well. What a comeback by the Mavericks. I've read more than a few people's predictions this week that San Antonio would topple Dallas in the playoffs. I don't see it. The Spurs are getting older, and Dallas just seems too hungry this year. I can't see them letting anyone take them in a seven game series. They are executing too well, and are insanely motivated to erase the memory of last years Finals dud. Anyone picking against them is crazy.
  

"John, I was first team All-State. I can put the ball anywhere I want to. I'll make it rain out here."

• Deadspin literally just put this up a minute ago and it immediately made it to the next bullet of this post. It's a video of some guy pulling a Barry Badrinath and sinking some fucking sick beer pong shots. One of the coolest videos I've ever seen.

• Drew at KSK had a particularly hilarious Sex Cannon post on their Thursday bukkake.

• The Phillies got a win out of an insanely entertaining game yesterday. Hamels didn't pitch his best, but JRoll hit his NL leading sixth homer (he must be juicing), and our bullpen was shaky enough to scare us, but not enough to blow the game. I picked a good first game to see in person. (On a funnier note, Freddy Garcia's first Phillies start was delayed by rain - on Jackie Robinson day, when every Phillie was scheduled to wear 42. Oh well.)

• Speaking of Jackie Robinson, Jerry Stackhouse wanted to honor him today by replacing his own name with Robinson on the back of his jersey. (He wears 42 out of respect for Robinson). I would normally disagree with a sports league being so stuck up about something like this, but I'm glad David Stern nixed this one. He doesn't even play the same sport as Jackie did. It just seems stupid to me.

Alright everyone, theres no Family Guy or American Dad because the ridiculously stupid-looking Drive premieres on FOX tonight. Enjoy the Sopranos and Entourage. And make sure to record the new VH1 show Charm School at ten east, it features the most retarded of all the idiot girls on the Flavor of Love shows trying to learn how to be civilized. That could be a classic in the making.

Weekend Recap

Ok, so Texas lost to USC. Hardly consolation for last year's Rose Bowl, so you Trojan fans can still sit and spin. Kevin Durant was still incredible (30 of UT's 68 points, plus 9 boards) and AJ Abrams had 20. DJ Augustin only had 6, and unfortunately he never horribly mutilated a knee on one of his bullshit out of control drives to the hoop that end with him getting blocked to the court. Asshole.

Anyway, Jimmie Johnson won again too. What a horrible day. He forced Tony Stewart into the wall with about 3 laps to go, ensuring a win. No way was Tony catching back up after bouncing his front fender off that concrete. Now I'm no Smoke apologist - a well aimed cruise missile at the front of that pack would have made me much happier than either of those two arrogant fucks winning, but oh well. And by the way, what's up with no one having any love for the man in the Jack car, #07 Clint Bowyer? He's had two 6 places, and would be much higher than 9th in the points if he didn't crash out of his top 10 place in Vegas a few weeks ago with less than 30 laps to go. He's looking like a dark horse not to just make the Chase, but contend for a top spot. Someone needs to give this guy a little love.

Let me get back to the tournament for a second. No team looks safe. I know everyone is sucking Kansas' collective dick, but they played Kentucky, easily the worst team any of the 1 seeds played in the second round. And they're in a region where all top 4 seeds have advanced. So if they beat the Saluki's, which is by far no lock, they get either Pitt or UCLA. I have UCLA over Va-Tech personally, so clearly I'm a jackass, but still - I stand by the Bruins.



Florida never seemed to really get it together against Butler. Sure they pulled out the win, but they all look like they are looking forward to taking a break, putting on their dresses (Joakhim Noah) and sitting back fucking sorority girls until draft time. Oregon takes them out.

UNC has never really looked like a 1 seed to me. But, I had them taking out GT so I'm sticking with it. They don't have a chance of winning it all though, no matter who else they play.

Ohio State should get by Tennessee with minimal trouble, but then lose to eventually tourney champ A&M. And it kills me to say that. I HATE A&M. I do. And I hope Acie Law IV tears every ligament in both knees after falling off the ladder while trying to cut down the net during 'One Shining Moment.' Only a prick would spell his name Acie, and only a prick would put Law IV on his jersey. Fuck you, theres no other Law on your team, drop the pretentious number.

So other then the Celtics getting fined and Kobe dropping 115 in two games, nothing much seemed to happen in the NBA this weekend. That leaves the clear highlight of this weekend the 18 hour debauchery that was Saturday. The tournament breaks until Thursday, but we'll be back before that to share our insight and knowledge with you lucky readers. After all, the words on this page are scripture. Except for any negative comments, those are blaspemy.